The Professional Sinner
When
I was baptized some weeks ago I gave my personal testimony as part of the
worship service. My father
appropriately titled my testimony, “The Professional Sinner”.
He said this because it emphasized where I had come from and how
wonderful it is that I had traveled spiritually to a whole new place.
I repeat those three paragraphs here as I believe they clearly depict
what’s happened to me since I met Jesus.
These are followed by additional thoughts about this since I originally
gave my testimony.
I thank God for loving me enough to bring me to the point that I am able to do this. I had a hard time determining what my testimony would be. I couldn’t decide whether I should include all the drama of my life or describe what a ‘professional sinner’ I was. It didn’t occur to me until 2:00 am Sunday night when I couldn’t sleep and while I was singing to my wife (so she would be as miserable as I was), what my testimony would be. For some reason, I got quiet and started thinking about my testimony.
I
believe God answered my wife’s prayer for me to shut up and decided to occupy
my mind with something worthwhile. It occurred to me that none of the things I
had done before mattered, what really mattered was what was happening since I
have been saved by the grace of God and that’s what’s important.
Maybe one day God will use my experiences to teach the wonderful mercy
and grace He has in abundance. For
now, I believe he wants me to express what he has done for me since I got saved.
I cannot do that until I tell you if not for the saving grace of God and the
fact that he loved me enough to carry me all of these years, I would not be
alive to tell you these things. My testimony is simply this: God has loved me in
the past and now loves me enough to forgive me no matter what I have done. Even after I asked for forgiveness God not only saved me but
poured so much grace on me there is no doubt he has always been with me.
I always wanted proof. He
gave it to me. I prayed for very specific things. He answered all of them.
I speak literally now and mean all of them. I asked for guidance. God
gave it. I asked for a good church.
He presented it to me. I asked for Christian friends that would take me
as I am. He gave them to me.
I asked God to remake me in a way that people would know that he lived in
me. Believe me, he is doing that as I speak. I asked Him, “Will I feel
anything different?” He gave me the Holy Spirit in such a way that I will
never doubt again.
God
saved me, loved me, carried me. He did it in the way that was best for me. I
have and will lay my life down for my Lord.
I thank him every second of every day for my Salvation. I have only one
regret. I regret I waited until I
was 33 to make this commitment.
I
love you Jesus and thank you for being my saving grace.
Since
then God has blessed me more times than I can count. He has answered many
prayers and continues to do so on a magnificent scale and in wondrous ways. God
is teaching me everyday how to live as I need to live, how to love and be a
servant to him and others, how to be compassionate and caring, and how to be a
witness for him. I asked God to teach me patience, even though my father warned
me that I may not particularly like how that lesson would be taught.
I still asked, and my father was right.
However, I admit my prayer is being answered. God continues to guide me
down the path he has chosen for me and even though I may fail miserably at times
he is there to pick me up and point me in the right direction.
God is powerful my friends and
always knows when and what is needed. He
never fails to provide me for my needs.
I have only been a Christian for about ten months.
In that ten months I have learned first hand about the power and Glory of
God. I have also learned that the powers of darkness are a force not exactly on
my side. Believe me those powers
have reared their ugly heads against me. But!
When they were working their hardest against me,
God was with me and stood for me every moment of those attacks.
When
I got saved I decided to go to Wesley Bible College.
My desire following graduation from Wesley was
to get a Masters of Divinity
and serve God in whatever way he told me to. Since that decision many
opportunities have come my way including an opportunity to attend a special
Graduate program at Vanderbilt. This opportunity along with all of the others
did not even make me blink or think about changing my path. I have dedicated my
life to God and nothing will change that nor the path that has been set before
me. I figure if God can do all that he has done for me, I can at the very least,
whole-heartedly serve him with all that I am.
Even if that means my life. God is a most wonderful and beautiful person
to have in my life. I find it
difficult to end this without saying more but I think you get a clear picture
about how I feel about Him and my relationship to Him.
I just hope that something I’ve said here today gives a clear picture of how He has blessed me, though I could never hope to completely explain the wonders he works in me every day.
JSE
If you would like to contact the writer of this testimony, please email the WebMaster at WebMaster@edelman-rp.com and it will be forwarded to JSE.
